"Jamison Sad"

Part of my parenting priorities is to help my little toddler learn how to identify his emotions. As early as I can remember I would say such things to him as "You must be frustrated" or "you must be sad" or "I can tell you feel angry". I often wonder when my carefully chosen words and well thought out phrases will pay off.

When Jamison is screaming because he can't find a toy and all I want to do is scream back "find it yourself" I take a deep breath, I control my own frustration, and I might say something like "You must be frustrated, maybe we can look for your toy together" If I cannot control myself enough to reason with Jamison I will say something to the tune of "Jamison, you must feel frustrated. Mommy feels frustrated too. Can you give mommy a minute. I think I need a time out." Believe it or not, when I put myself in time out he almost always gives me a few minutes to calm myself down. This doesn't mean that I never snap and yell or stomp my feet just like my almost 2 year old but when I do I make sure to apologize for my inappropriate behavior.

So all this deep breathing and emotion identifying and I still find myself wondering when will it pay off. My answer, today! When Jamison was upset and crying over wanting more of my attention he wheeled himself over to me using a Flinstone like driving technique in his "truck" aka sports coupe, looked at me with his teary little eyes and said "Jamison sad". I was so happy! No, not happy that my son was sad, happy that he was able to articulate it. How amazing it is to watch my baby grow into a little person? How amazing is it that I get to be the one to teach him such skills as identifying which emotion it is he is feeling? I'm so lucky and so blessed that I get to be Jamison's mommy!